January was a great month with a lot of strong competition, great contributions by
a number of very active computer geeks and our first two inductees into the Community
Credit hall of fame. This month's newsletter brings you some of the funniest, stupidest and most politically incorrect computer humor on the web.
Before we get to all of those items that will make you rethink ever becoming part
of Community Credit, let's cover some of the latest and greatest goings on with Community Credit.
Sections:
a) Word from your loyal Community Leader.
b) Submitting your points
c) Community Credit Hall of Fame
d) January Wiinners
e) Top leaders for the month (so far)
f) This Month's prizes
g) Funny Videos
h) Clips from The Office: Funniest Show on TV
i) Funny News: Hot off the press
j) Funny Computer Cartoons
k) Funny Computer Jokes
l) Special: An interview with Myself
m) Your suggestions
n) Take me off this newsletter NOW
Hello, this is David Silverlight, the twisted soul who is very involved in the
developer community and who has apparently too much free time. In this issue I
have the pleasure to announce last month's winners, this month's prizes and a cause
that offers very litttle(if nothing) to society, but might be appreciated by fans
of the TV show, "The Office" Since this
is the first issue. Let me also
thank everybody for their contributions who has participated so far.
I hope that you have benefited and even won a prize for your contributions to the
development community. You will even learn about my latest activity, the
Dwight Bobblehead petition.
If you are wondering about this petition you can learn more about it in my Interview
a bit below. Okay, I could not actually get anybody to interview me so, I
decided to take matters into my own hands.
The is a good time to start submitting your contributions to development community. If you would like to win one of the
great geek prizes
for this month,
please go submit your contributions on the point submission page. As you know,
the more you contribute, the more points you get. The geeks with the most
points wins.
This month we are inducting our first two hall of fame members. Community Credit Hall of Famers are those contributors whos reputation precedes them in the development community. They are developers and technology evangelists who have
contributed so substantially that they become among the forces that really help the development community thrive.
This month we are inducting Russ Fustino and Joe Healy (loud applause).
I can attest personally to their contributions in the SouthEast area through their organization
of Code Camps, .NET Pub Clubs and the never-ending 24/7 support that they lend to the development community. They have helped
shaped the development community into what it is today. Kudos to the both of you for a job well done!!!
In future, nominees to the Community Credit Hall of Fame will be made by a combination of decisions by existing Hall of Famers, with 2 new members per month, and submissions by members who suggest candidates. To suggest a potential Hall of Famer, please
send an email to admin@community-credit.com
Congratulations to everybody who has participated in January. Even though you may not be taking home a prize, you are all winners in the development community. Here
are the winners from January. Kudos to you!!!
Grand Prize Winner: Mimobots 512MB USB Flash Drives - Ryan Olshan 66,000 Points
1st Prize Winner: USB Optical Liquid Duck or Fish Mouse - Ricardo Figueira 50,000 Points
2nd Prize Winner: USB Mini Lava Lamp - Jonathan Goodyear 41,000 Points
3rd Prize Winner: Geek Love Poem T-Shirt Winner - Robin Ann Peters 38,500 Points
4th Prize Winner: TV-B-Gone - J. Ambrose Little 31,000 Points
5th Prize Winner: Red Swingline Stapler - Wallace B. McClure 21,000 Points
Below are the top contenders so far this month. The below folks have earned
their points by their contributions to the development community. These individuals have so far
seperated from the pack and are on their way to winning something geeky, but there are still about 2 weeks
left for others to join them.
Robin Ann Peters (45000)
Tom Fuller (21000)
Choirul (18000)
Jim Zimmerman (14000)
Monte Richardson (12000)
Dennis Bottjer (7000)
deepak jain (6000)
Jose Fuentes (6000)
warren hart (4000)
Jack Hewitt (2000)
This Month's
Prizes...
You can see all of the prizes
here But here is a summary of them.
Grand Prize: LaserPod - The 21st Century version of the lava lamp
1st Prize: Anti Gravity Top - Yes, It's levitating. Really
2nd Prize: HTTP Panties - "What is your status?"
3rd Prize: Nano Kitty - "iPod Identity Crisis"
4th Prize: Location Earthdog tags - Abducted by aliens? Find your
way home.
5th Prize: Faucet Light, Blue - "It will make washing hands cool
again"
6th Prize: Vapo Blaster - "Motorized Bubble Vaporizer"
7th Prize: Talking Monty python Black Night - "Nothing but a flesh
wound"
8th Prize: Geekman Action figure - "Superhero of the everyday geek"
See the prize details at: http://www.community-credit.com/CommunityCreditPrizePage.aspx
Keep your parents off the net.
Hilarious!!!! From the guys over at Dead Troll. I am still laughing as I type this description.
A bit of Mouse humor.
Mice using mice. What is this world coming to?
Stupid Secretary?
I am not sure, I would say "Stupid". I guess that old habits die hard
Microsoft Shared your pain
Let's face it, computer users get annoyed when faced with a recurring Windows bug. Now, Microsoft is sharing your pain by allowing you to torture bug-prone engineers.
How to lose your job!
What could be worse than getting so drunk at the office party that you insult your boss and get your sorry ass fired? Having the whole incident displayed on the Iinternet - that's what!
Having a bad day at work?
What could be worse than getting so drunk at the office party that you insult your boss and get your sorry ass fired? Having the whole incident displayed on the Internet
- that's what!
The System Administrator Song
Love this one from DeadTroll. Pretty catchy... You fill will yourself singing along..."He might be there an hour, might be there all day, but sometimes, he just presses caps lock and walks away"
Behind the scenes at Microsoft
See what really goes on behind the scenes of the development of the next version of windows. You have heard about the little man in the box, right?
Welcome to the internet help desk
This one is an absolute classic!!!! I have seen it a million times and can still watch it. "Ok, sir, did you boot it up? No sir, do not kick it! Is it started yet?"
Okay, for those of you who have never seen this show, let me turn you on to it. It is by far one of the funniest, if not THE funniest show I
have ever scene. It is produced like an office documentary, but it just catches the real nuances and with comedians like Steve Carrel on it can
not help but be a riot. If you have seen it, you will know what I mean and you will definitely want to check out my
Dwight Schute Bobblehead Petition.
Here are a few clips to show everybody what I am raving about.
The Halloween party - This episode takes place on the day of the Office Halloween Party. Well, the boss has to fire somebody based on orders from the higher ups. He is having a really difficult time in deciding who to pick. He can not make the decision because he abhors being the bad guy and is trying to get others to make the decision for him. He asked a few others who to recommend, but nobody wants to be the person to decide which of their colleagues gets fired. That is the boss's job, after all. Dwight, on the other hand, is all too happy to name just about anybdoy in the office, except himself. The exchange between Dwight and the Boss is hilarious, especially when you factor in the costumes.
Email Surveillance - This episode involves Michael (the boss) getting caught doing email surveillance on the office. This is the funniest justification for Big Brother ever!!!!
Office Prank on Dwight - "Where is my desk?" Okay, calm down... Where is the last place you left it?" I am not sure what is funnier, the prank, or the fact that he actually starts working at his desk afterwards.
Who says that Java programmers don't have a sense of humor
I've heard the stereotypes about Java programmers being uptight nerds who don't know how to cut loose. Well, that's about as far from the truth as Enterprise is from Gene Roddenberry's original vision. Contrary to what you may have heard, Javaheads can be quite the cut-ups. Read more....
Chess Supercomputer Beaten Up By More Popular Computer
IBM's Deep Blue, the chess supercomputer that recently contended with world chess champion Gary Kasparov, was beaten up Monday by a Macintosh Performa 6400CD, one of the most popular home computers on the market. Read More...
If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over!
To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"!
If you needed a break from life, click on suspend.
Hit "any key" to continue life when ready.
To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.
To add/remove someone in your life, click settings and control panel.
To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.
If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.
When you lose your car keys, click on find.
"Help" with the chores is just a click away.
Auto insurance wouldn't be necessary. You would use your diskette to recover from
a crash.
And, we could click on "SEND NOW" and a Pizza would be on it's way to YOU...
The train is so crowded that you cannot get anywhere near that nice girl at the
other end...
You wish there was zoom & 'view full screen' in life!
After marriage you realize that there is bound to be a mismatch...
You wish there was an evaluation period or at least a sample down load or a demo
version!
One day you realize that you are turning bald...
You wish there was cut and paste in life
As most technophiles are aware, there are special programs to run scanners. These
programs use a TWAIN driver to perform the scanning. TWAIN, the acronym, stands
for "Technology Without An Interesting Name."
There are 11 types of people who understand binary: the ones who do, the ones who
don't, and the ones that pretend to get this joke! (thanks Monte for this
one)
Unfortunately, there was no interest in actually interviewing me, so I decided to do it myself. So here is me interviewing me....
Me: Hello David
Me: Hi, it's nice to be here
Me: So, tell me a bit about yourself?
Me: Well, me, as you probably already know, I am a software developer who focuses on .NET as well as XML and also spends quite a bit of my spare time when I am not working (and I use term loosely) helping others in the development community, speaking and working on my various websites.
Me: Speaking of work, how do you actually get work done with all of these websites that you are continuously developing?
NonProfitways.com, Community-Credit.com,
XMLPitstop.com... Where do you find the time to actually finish your paid consulting work?
Me: Funny you should ask... Yeah, clients ask me all the time, "Is that project done yet?", "Weren't you supposed to have that finished already?", "What happened to my website?". Those guys crack me up...such kidders. I just tell them it will be done next week. It keeps em happy for another week.
Note: If you happen to be one of my clients and are reading this, please ignore the previous few question. BTW, your project will be done next week.
Me: I see that you have taken up a cause recently..."The Dwight Schrute Bobblehead Petition". Tell me more about that.
Me: Well, that is a new and important cause that I have decided to spearhead. It was actually a toss-up between that and world-hunger. I flipped a coin and well, sorry hunger, the bobblehead cause took it. You can read more about it on the Bobblehead Petition page.
Me: That is pretty stupid, actually. Is that going to really help the world in any way?
Me: No.
Me: Do you think that folks really care about this?
Me: No.
Me: What do you think folks will think of the idea when they see it?
Me: Well, if you have not seen the show, you will think, "That is the stupidest thing that I have ever seen!". If you are a fan of the show, you will think, "That is the stupidest thing I have ever seen!!! Where do I sign?"
Me: What is typically the first reaction will be when they hear about your petition.
Me: Well, the initial reaction is usually "There is seriously wrong with that guy" or "That guy has just way too much free time on his hands". Fans of "The Office" Show I think really love the idea. The show is just hilarious and there really is not a whole lot of Office Stuff to buy except for some lame t-shirts. This might help to speed the process of them creating useless gadgets for fans to spend money on. You have seen my site, community-credit.com, so this should not really be much of a shock.
Me: Shouldn't you be working on other things right now instead of the Bobblehead Petition?
Me: Absolutely, but this is much more fun.
Me: Has anybody actually signed your petition?
Me: Yeah, it is pure insanity. At first, maybe 50 a day, but now that some
websites have taken a liking to it, I am getting a few signatures per minute.
Crazy, eh?
Me: I attended a few of your sessions lately at a recent conference and heard you talking about networking and helping the development community. Why do you feel that is so important?
Me: It is the best way to get to work on new and exciting projects. The best way to really get recognized as somebody who can spearhead a new project is by helping others. What a better way to start off a relationship than by helping somebody solve a problem. If somebody needs help with a project the natural first choice would be to look to somebody who solve a problem that the were struggling with. The other reason is programmer Karma... If you help somebody solve a problem when they are stuck, then the forces of the universe will direct help to you when you are in that same position.
Me: Programmer Karma? Come on now, is that a term that you just made up?
Me: Yes
Me: Do you have time for one more question?
Me: Listen, buddy, I would love to chat with you all day about this and that, but I have places to be.
If you love the idea of Community Credit and know others that you think will benefit from it, please spread the word. Invite friends to check it out, Blog about it or link to us.
Well, this is the second issue of the Community Credit newsletter. I hope that you
enjoyed it. Let me know what you think. Do you love it, hate it, like parts, would add this...., would remove that..... Please share your thoughts with me. Remember, it can only get better.
Just drop me an email at admin@community-credit.com. I will remove you permanently and you will no longer recieve any newsletters from community-credit.com. I hate spam as much, if not more, as the next guy and will respect your privacy and remove you immediately.
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