Welcome to the very first Community Credit newsletter, where we showcase some of
the funniest, stupidest and politically incorrect computer humor on the web.
Before we get to all of those items that will make you rethink every becoming part
of Community Credit, let me tell you a bit about how the newsletter is organized.
Sections:
a) Word from the Point Monger.
b) Submitting your points
c) Top leaders for the month.
d) Funny Videos
e) Funny comics
f) Funny Jokes
g) Your suggestions
h) Take me off this newsletter NOW
Hello, this is David Silverlight, the twisted soul who is very involved in the
developer community and who has apparently too much free time. Since this
is the first issue, let me start by thanking everybody who has participated so far.
I hope that you have benefitted and even won a prize for your contributions to the
development community.
The end of the month is growing near. If you would like to win won of these
great geek prizes,
please go submit your contributions to the developer community. As you know,
the more you contribute, the more points you get. The geeks with the most
points wins.
Below are the top contenders so far this month. The below folks have earned
their points by their contributions to the development community. These individuals have so far
seperated from the pack and are on their way to winning something geeky, but there are still a few days
left for others to join them.
Ricardo Figueira (46000)
Jonathan Goodyear (41000)
J. Ambrose Little (21000)
Ryan Olshan (20500)
Wallace B. McClure (17000)
Sonu Kapoor (13500)
Robin Ann Peters (12000)
Larry Port (6000)
Moca Loca (6000)
Rob Foster (6000)
Developers....Developer....Developer....
How can you not love this classic Steve Ballmer Clip?
CEO of Microsoft, Steve Balmer, stirs up the troops. Looked to me like he
was about to drop. I am happy he survived, though.
Disgruntled Employee
I love the 2nd example in this video. It will make you think twice the next
time you throw something at one of your coworkers
Saying Yes, the worst job ever?
This video puts the most obnoxious and hated person into the right perspective.
Mac equals Suck
This is a classic spoof on apple ads from a guy who LOVES macs.
Microsoft LiveMeeting commercial.
An oldie, but goody demonstrates the an understated benefit of using Live meeting and just working from home. It really zings you from out of nowhere
Email Santa Instead
Well, I never gave you anything for Christmas. Here is a video that will ruin your vision of Santa and encourage you to email instead of writing him. This may also
explain, in an all too disturbing way, why I never got a reply from that letter that I wrote to Santa when I was 6.
Those hidden windows settings
"I'm sorry sir, the error seems to be occuring 12 inches away from the monitor."
Make money and, oh yeah, make money
Describe your problem: ____________________________________________
Now, describe the problem accurately:
___________________________________________________________________
Speculate wildly about the cause of the problem:
___________________________________________________________________
Problem Severity:
A. Minor__
B. Minor__
C. Minor__
D. Trivial__
Nature of the problem:
A. Locked Up__
B. Frozen__
C. Hung__
D. Shot__
Is your computer plugged in? Yes__ No__
Is it turned on? Yes__ No__
Have you tried to fix it yourself? Yes__ No__
Have you made it worse? Yes__
Have you read the manual? Yes__ No__
Are you sure you've read the manual? Yes__ No__
Are you absolutely certain you've read the manual? No__
Do you think you understood it? Yes__ No__
If `Yes' then why can't you fix the problem yourself?
___________________________________________________________________
How tall are you? Are you above this line? _______
What were you doing with your computer at the time the problem occurred?
___________________________________________________________________
If `nothing' explain why you were logged in.
___________________________________________________________________
Are you sure you aren't imagining the problem? Yes__ No__
How does this problem make you feel?
___________________________________________________________________
Tell me about your childhood ____________________________________________
Do you have any independent witnesses of the problem? Yes__ No__
Can't you do something else, instead of bothering me? Yes__
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Person asked the young
programmer, "And what starting salary were you looking for?" The programmer said, "In the neighborhood of $75,000 a year, depending on the benefit's package." The HR Person said, "Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years - say, a red Corvette?" The programmer sat up straight and said, "Wow!!! Are you kidding?" And the HR Person said, "Certainly, ...but you started it."
- I've never heard about that.
- It did work yesterday.
- Well, the program needs some fixing.
- How is this possible?
- The machine seems to be broken.
- Has the operating system been updated?
- The user has made an error again.
- There is something wrong in your test data.
- I have not touched that module!
- Yes yes, it will be ready in time.
- You must have the wrong executable.
- Oh, it's just a feature.
- I'm almost ready.
- Of course, I just have to do these small fixes.
- It will be done in no time at all.
- It's just some unlucky coincidence.
- I can't test everything!
- THIS can't do THAT.
- Didn't I fix it already?
- It's already there, but it has not been tested.
- It works, but it's not been tested.
- Somebody must have changed my code.
- There must be a virus in the application software.
- Even though it does not work, how does it feel?
If you love the idea of Community Credit and know others that you think will benefit from it, please spread the word. Invite friends to check it out, Blog about it or link to us.
Well, this is the first issue of the Community Credit newsletter. Let me know what you think. Do you love hate it, like parts, would add this...., would remove that..... Please share your thoughts with me. Remember, it will only get better.
Just drop me an email at admin@community-credit.com. I will remove you permanently and you will no longer recieve any newsletters from community-credit.com. I hate spam as much, if not more, as the next guy and will respect your privacy and remove you immediately.
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